Category Archives: The Revolving Door

My Stupid Sister Viva invented a new word: “VIVAJAZZLING!”






Look what just popped up in my inbox. and my smart phone. And now the home and ARDOR office phones are ringing off the hook because Little Miss Freeloader is not only crashing with me again (until I can locate … Continue reading






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“Viva Hearts Tiger!”






Yes darling, “Viva Hearts Tiger!” That is the text message I received. My stupid sister Viva meant to send it to her new boyfriend. The one she met recently while she’s in treatment (again) for sex addiction. Instead, she sent … Continue reading






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Operation: Litcrawl (a/k/a “Litquake”) or let’s get “Dirty In The Alley”, darling!






Location: Clarion Alley, to be exact (October 17, 2009, 18:00 PST) for Operation: Litcrawl, as part of Litquake. Members of the Mrs Robinson’s Society will be on hand to provide impossibly stylish security detail (and secure the perimeter so there … Continue reading






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The Final Session of Sibling Psychotherapy






Here’s one chapter I’m more than happy to see come to a close: my stupid sister Viva and I had our final session of sibling psychotherapy. Not because we have “Healed Our Shared Wound” or “Built a Bridge of Love” … Continue reading






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A new category of torture for the CIA: psychotherapy with my stupid sister Viva.






All of Tak’s efforts at bringing closer together¬† Viva “call me VFer” (don’t ask) and yours truly are beginning to feel like a lesson in futility (from this point known as an “LFu” — much easier for VFer to pronounce). … Continue reading






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My stupid sister Viva: putting the “psycho” in sibling psychotherapy.






Session 2 with Tak, and I don’t believe progress was made. He has established that we have a dependent (Viva on me, naturally) / co-dependent relationship. Yes darling I know, does it get any more cliche than that? So he … Continue reading






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Day 1 of sibling counseling with Viva La Diva






This is going to be a long, hard chapter in my life. I can tell already. At ARDOR’s insistence, I’ve begun sibling counseling with my stupid sister Viva. On Monday, we met with Tak Ishii, one of the most esteemed … Continue reading






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Now Hiring: Bodyguard






I’ve going to be on assignment in the middle east in a few short weeks, and the brains at ARDOR have decided that due to current unrest there, I will need a bodyguard. Can you believe that? A bodyguard! But… … Continue reading






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Welcome, darling. Come inside.






Meet Vulva Fervor: a glamorous peacekeeping agent whose powers of persuasion are far more deadly than any show of force. She is about to face her greatest challenge yet: suppressing the urge to gag her jet-setting, air-headed, loose-lipped ‚Äústupid sister … Continue reading






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Technology Breakthrough: THE INVIGORATION RAY






Introducing the latest from ARDOR’s technology department: THE INVIGORATION RAY! It’s a “thermostat” that lets you reset your body’s age on a molecular level. In addition to the obvious breakthrough in disease prevention and cure that this is, don’t think … Continue reading






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