Meet my stupid sister Viva.

Squealing with delight at the sight of each line, as if it's her first.

Squealing with delight at the sight of each line, as if it were her first.

Imagine my delight when our weapons department came up with its latest stroke of genius: a mirror that wipes out short term memory! They asked me to take it home for a few days “live with it, test it out.” Boy, did they ever ask the right gal. Because my stupid sister Viva is crashing on my sofa right now.

And like moth to flame…

Bitch still steals all my stuff. Last time it was the Dior Lipstick prototype from our Chemical Weapons Division. Time before that, the Jimmy Choo reptile boots that shoot tranquilizer darts. It was funny, someone targeted her when she was wearing them because they thought she was me! And that’s when we found the perfect job for Viva: decoy.

But please don’t tell her. If she knows, she just blow it. If she must stay here — rent free, I might add — until we complete our family counseling sessions (don’t ask), she might as well make herself useful. Even if she doesn’t know it. Of course I would never let any harm come to her…

Don't let us interrupt you!

Don't let us interrupt you!

Look! Here she is playing with the compact version. She loves mirrors. Very attractive design, I must admit.

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